So on today’s blog, we would be talking about the aftermath of insecurity.
I know I’ve written about insecurity and, I covered some of my insecurities but, on todays blog we would be talking about what it feels like to get over insecurity.
What triggered me to write this post was an acquaintance of mine whose status I came across today, she spoke about how insecure she used to feel about her body and herself.
This was me in secondary school. I was insecure about my height, my teeth, my smile; cause my friends used to tell me I smiled like a squirrel. Infact, I was insecure about my legs too. I remember being on the assembly ground and comparing my yam legs to that of the slender girls in my set. I also was called ‘flat’ as I didn’t grow at the pace most of the girls in my set grew due to puberty. I would sometimes wonder what it was like to be in somebody else’s body. To be someone else other than me.
This indeed was me 3 years ago. But, that’s not the same Senami of today. The Senami of today has taught herself to be courageous, to stand tall admist all diversities, and to be grateful for how far she has come in building her confidence. Getting over insecurity was something that I had to teach myself. I would look at myself in the mirror and tell myself how beautiful I am and I won’t stop saying it until I felt the words.
I had to reconstruct my mind, pray and work hard as insecurity isn’t a walk in the park. It sometimes still hits me how my insecurites were once a prayer point of mine.
I remember in Secondary school I wasn’t usually amongst the girls that were said to be pretty, and no matter how many times my mom or my sisters told me how beautiful I looked, I felt like it was only said because they are my family.
Guys, I’ve never felt as beautiful as I feel now after I got over my insecurities. When I tell you that I felt even more beautiful when I cut my hair, you had best believe me. Because the me of 3 years ago wouldn’t have tried to do it. I mean, I wasn’t amongst the prettiest even with hair on my head not to talk of without it. It was something I did out of impulse and I haven’t regretted cutting my hair not even for a day.
Infact, when people tell me how beautiful I look now, I take the compliment as an addition to the beautiful attributes I have given myself. Seeking validation from people won’t take you anywhere the only validation you need is your own approval.
Looking at myself now, I wonder why I ever felt insecure, because who cares about beauty standards? I am my own beauty standard. Like, I am a beauty on my own!
My advice to people going through insecurity is that one day it will pass, one day you’re going to feel loved, beautiful and more glorious than you’ve ever felt but, you are not going to feel this way in a long time if you do not work for it. They say to enjoy everlasting grace, one has to work for it. You need to work for it and set your own beauty standard, because you’re a spec and I am rooting for you.
